Gaming Reverie

Generally, Let’s Plays are a horrible, horrible thing. Not only because they’re generally written/orated without humor or wit, no no, it’s mostly because you’re watching someone play a video game. At length! And while some gems are surely to be found in the archive (for those with patience), I suggest you don’t look there at all and just watch the following instead. It’s pure awesome, and highly quotable:

Bito… bito pizza…

• Kotaku

As mentioned earlier, I have an odd, newfound predilection for baths. It’s weird. And good.

And I’m not alone! Not only does Japan love their bathhouses, they also dedicate entire virtual towns to baths. Witness this cheery welcome message I recieved upon arrival in Bath, a town in Dragon Quest IV:

Welcome to Bath, town o’ baths!

The perfect place for trav’llers to rest their achy bones after a long time on the road.

WiiWare is getting a present.

In fact, it’s already recieved a few: Toki Tori, Mega Man 9, and World of Goo are excellent. Not to mention the wonderful Orbient, the best of the ported Art Style series. But the rest is crap like Family Glide Hockey. And regardless of it’s great titles, the service could really use something more… musical.

Developed by Gaijin games, BIT.TRIP BEAT is a trippy rhythmic arcade experience with a retro (like, Atari retro) look. It plays a little like Pong, only if Pong had an adventure mode… in space. Maybe you should just see for yourself:

Notice the excellent chiptune music? Just from this clip, I have a feeling that the music will drive this game as it drove Rez or Lumines. The gameplay, while seemingly simple at the beginning, alludes to more chaos and depth near the last few seconds of the trailer. Which, really, brings to mind Mega Man 9 — another retro game that utilizes the design philosophies of modern games.

Only a few more months of shovelware, and we’ll be gifted with a trance.

I’m working on giving the site a new look. Maybe even a logo! Any feedback via the comments would be great during its inevitable myriad of design changes.

Meanwhile! A good chunk of the now-laid off 1up crew (including those who used to produce the 1up Show) have a new site called “Area 5″, a name that’s based on their favorite level of the insane/beautiful/musical game Rez. They’re continuing the 1up Show shtick with a new video series, “CO-OP”. The gang is still getting equipment together, and time is short, so this is just part 1 of a Favorite Games of 2008 show. It’s clear just a few minutes in how very thoughtful and well-put-together the show is. Keep an eye on their website for more of their stuff. Enjoy:

2008 — not the greatest year for this little site. In general, my year exploded and sparkled in brilliant colors, but in a particular sad quadrant of my life — that would be the toothy-quadrant — 2008 remained a dull black. Toothaches, man. Pairing physical pain with a general financial hopelessness in trying to treat said pain is never good on the psyche, and certainly not good for fledgling, soon-to-be-spectacular, and thoughtful gaming sites like this one.

You know what? I give a strong damn about this fine little site, and I’m not about to let it slip away into the filthy crevices of internet armpits. So please keep checking back then and again, knowing that this site is thinking about you… like a beautiful, hospitalized grandparent with too many setbacks to show well-deserved love.

Again, thanks for your patience with these desolate spurts of blogs. In the meantime, please try and enjoy the beautiful, heartfelt joy that is Mother 3. I couldn’t recommend it more. I’ll get to the ‘why’ later.

Let’s be honest, folks. Sometimes we feel awful, and we simply have to hole up. Curl up in our own grime and tears and snot. Feel bad for ourselves whilst drinking cheap orange juice. But this is not one of those days. In fact, I kind of have to write and be productive. I know, it’s one of those experiences potential writers (like myself) hope for — that venerated need. Really the experience isn’t romantic — it’s hardly likable even. But here I am, writing, while I feel like shit.

Not emotionally, mind you. Just physically. Granted, though, the physical deterioration is taking a toll on my mental well-being, but I’m trying to remain calm and positive. I have a loving wife and good, supportive friends, which is helping me immensely.

It’s ridiculous how long it’s been since I’ve blogged, let alone blogged about those trivial, lovely little things called video games, but there’s good reason for it. For one, I’ve been too absorbed playing little wonders like Mother 3 to patiently stand back and write for a second. Also, as mentioned time and time again on this blog, I have “weak teeth.” Teeth that, regardless of tireless brushing and flossing, are very soft and manage to break quite easily. Currently, I have four very “weak” teeth, one in each corner of my mouth. I’m suffering a gauntlet of pain before I get my teeth fixed. Luckily that’s happening soon, after Christmas. (Money is a difficult thing to come at peace with, these days.)

Are you familiar with the laughing scene in Evil Dead 2? The protagonist, Ash, goes nuts after being assaulted continually by a very haunted house. He sits in a chair, and the various objects in the room come to life and start laughing. Eventually, he gives in — Ash laughs hysterically at the evil forces at hand, at himself, at his demise.

At least his teeth look OK.

Almost at that point.

I hope everyone else is doing swimmingly.

I’ll get better.

All tooth complaints aside, I’m pretty brokenhearted over the horrible, horrible state of the Adventure Genre. I’ve been writing about adventure games for a good while now, and the market is changing from saturated-with-crap to saturated-with-nothing. At this point, it feels like only TellTale Games can save the genre. But of course, with more casual and episodic games being their forte, people will still need that Big Game. Maybe the legendary Ron Gilbert could save us. I don’t know, but I haven’t played anything fantastic since Grim Fandango, which was released something like a decade ago.

And… this is where I get up and clean the filthy, damp blackness that is mold that’s been invading my house. My lungs are feeling greasy. Good thing, though: the mold may not come back. I’m going to (attempt to) suck out all the moisture.

My maintenance guy came today with a dehumidifier, an object large and square and cold. I’m not sure where I’m going to put the huge thing, or if it’s something that can even be put — it’s far too unwieldy. So, for now, it’s just sitting in the middle of my apartment being loud and weird as I type.

Whirrr… burrr… whirrr… burrr….

On a lighter note, I’m quite happy with this trailer for the ridiculously titled Super Street Fighter II Turbo HD: Remix.

Oddly, its music paring has erased all relevancy and special memories of what I once deemed the “Karate Kid Anthem”. In two minutes, it just became, for me, Street Fighter Anthem.

Kinda weird how that happens.

Internet, Let Us Whine About Teeth. (Edit: Removed pretentious usage of Old English. For my own sanity.)

As mentioned before, I have a veritable tooth-sickness, and every day feels like dying and suffering. Clarification: This isn’t depression, this isn’t discontent. My life is grand. It’s pure physical, stressful illness. The pain from various tooth problems is steadily weakening my immune system, thus hampering any liveliness of the soul. Quite frankly, it’s fucking awful. I seriously feel too cold, too often.

This, friends, is the feeling of death in your throat.

I’ve had multiple root canals, and need more. I have neither the money or insurance to cover any. It kind of gets worse. See, I’m a neurotic. Like, big time. And when your tooth needs a root canal, said tooth feels pressure-sensitive. When it’s too late for one, you feel nothing. So here I am, worrisome me, letting cold water run on rotty teeth to make sure they’ll still be there.

Yes, I’m whining. Yes, my hygeine could’ve been better as a child. My soda intake alone was obscene. But truly, I just hope none of you feel like I do right now — sick and weak and cold.

I’ve been extremely anxious about the election, so I’ve decided to take up bathing. For the past three days, I’ve found a weird, new relief in sitting in a tub and reading John Fante. It’s beautiful. And I love him. Not romantically, it’s not like that. It’s an appreciative love. His writing is self-pitying, hilarious, and most importantly, it has nothing to do with the election. I can see where that old dog Bukowski (famous for calling Fante “his God”) learned his tricks.

And let me tell you about the bathing: it’s divine. I’ll lay back reading for an hour or so, I’ll think simple, mindless thoughts. I’ll have very few worries.

But this is a problem. The worries I do have are extremely petty. See, as I’m pining over, say, the water that seeped through a quarter of a page, I should be much more worried about the percolation of my laziness into the normally-productive part of my day.

And now that I think about it (I’ve never thought of it before), I feel displaced about that fact that I take baths. I’m not ready for the role, it’s not me. I’m 27 and now, suddenly, I take baths. I’m not sure if I can handle a Facebook or MySpace profile with “enjoys bathing” sticking out like a beacon. I’m not ready for the bathing community. The bath parties. The bathhouses. The bath snobs. The knitting-circle housewives that shun me for not including Epsom-salts during my Tuesday baths. The expensive shampoo. The oils. Oh! the oils! The herbs.

Hmm. Y’know, those showers aren’t so bad.

{And for all parties interested, I’l be playing LittleBigPlanet and will be playing LittleBigPlanet exclusively for at least a few more decades.}

So, there’s this really odd idea folks have about companies. They think, for example, that many of them are only in it “for the money.” I, sadly, am also saddled with these thoughts when it comes to larger corporations. But apparently in the console world things tend to differ.

I’m talking about Xavix.

I ran into a Xavix “console” at the Loews hotel in Coronado bay, in the “game room.” Now, I have to admit, I let out a little chuckle when I first saw the thing, which slightly resembled an ugly, bulky, first gen green laptop. And then, regrettably, I let out a guffaw when I realized that it was another sad Wii clone, with toy sports equipment and the exact same games found in Wii Sports. Soon after, though, my snarky giggles dissipated as I realized that the money of hard-working, clueless families is being wasted on such crap, and for so much money. Each individual game costs up to eighty bucks, for example. This is rape, I said to myself. Money rape.

But then I realized that these feelings, these heated, varied emotions were all wrong wrong wrong when I saw the company website. Because they CARE. In fact, they’re philosophers as well. Allow me to display a brief snippet from their website:

The XaviX Concept – Advocating Change
Though it may be wishful thinking, if the Human world could avert war and oppression, and abandon foolishness, there would be no borders between people in countries around the world and there would be a single future for everyone. People would always be searching for the truth, enriching their knowledge, and never forget compassion for fellow man. On top of that, they would be able to solve things by means they had never thought possible. If only this could be the world to come.

See! Xavix is here for us. Because they’re smart. They don’t just give us common knowledge. In fact, they know complex things about life, such as that war is bad. Now, if you’ll allow me to continue, please read how Xavix plans to advocate change with it’s revolutionary, life-changing game console (Keep in mind that SSD is simply the parent company of Xavix):

Now, just imagine if SSD COMPANY LIMITED (SSD) could accelerate the arrival of this world.
SSD would unconsciously remove these borders placed around us – borders between people, man, and machines, and dreams and reality. This would bring everyone in the world together, and for the first time our lives and awareness would probably change anew.

In line with this basic philosophy, SSD values “human science.” SSD continually searches for new possibilities to pursue, and challenges new horizons, and continues to propose a new living environment for people.

Our products are a wonderful tool for communications between people, foster and strengthen human bonds, transcend race and borders, and make more and more people smile.

Our wish and ultimate mission is to bring happiness to people.

Wow, guys, wow. I never knew an electronic device could accelerate the arrival of this world.

Xavix — Available at a swanky hotel near you.